literature

Tempted

Deviation Actions

asymmetrical-wings's avatar
Published:
315 Views

Literature Text

Just looking,

Seeing the knife.

Seeing it cut.

 

It makes my arms go numb:

It tempts me.

I want to see the crimson river

Flow down my wrist.

 

But I can’t cut;

I need to stop myself.

But it’s really hard,

So hard in fact.

But I am trying to avoid it.

I don’t want to hurt myself:

Again…

© 2012 - 2024 asymmetrical-wings
Comments11
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
xkitsunexudonx's avatar
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star: Vision
:star::star::star::star::star: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star: Technique
:star::star::star::star-empty::star-empty: Impact

I really like this piece. It's very emotional and relatable. The only thing I think might improve it would be to kind of go into the "why" it is you're cutting.. Again it's already great the way it is. Im just saying it would be more... LIke going into the more deeply rooted emotions below the surface. I mean, on top there is that temptation and conflict with self, but I would personally like to see more of the root of that and the self-destructiveness (if what I'm saying makes any sense at all.... Lol) Or maybe just to describe some of the other emotions that cause the temptation.